Sunday, November 28, 2010

Are there other options?

To many teenage girls, Tw*l*ght may seem like the only interesting reading option. Vampires, werewolves and true love. But this deadly foursome will only leave you with a headache after banging your head against the wall because you read it. People tend to think that Stephanie Meyer's widely read books are the be-all, end-all. However this is untrue. There are many books that have nothing to do with bloodsucking creatures or werewolves. Here are several: Pride and Prejudice, A Walk to Remember, and Rachel's Tears. So when you, my dear reader, go to the library to pick up a book, please stay out of the vampire section.

Sunday, August 15, 2010

Twilight? A classic? The REAL Scoop

Thousands of teens across the nation are overcome with love for Tw*l*ght. But is it truly a book worth reading?? I say NO! Tw*l*ght is a story of bloodthirsty vampires in love with a seemingly normal girl. However you cannot possibly be normal if you have an odd magnetism towards giant parasites and evil wolf dudes. How can this possibly make sense? The truth is: it doesn't. So why do so many teens fill their heads with this rubbish? Because they haven't read our blog. So now because of your enlightenment you too can have power in your decisions instead of falling for super pale dudes and dudes with identity crisis. Yay you!

Sunday, August 8, 2010

Backstage look at Jacob Black a.k.a. Werewolf

First off, werewolf really... what is so attractive about that? They eat meat and attack humans pretty much like vampires do. Bella is going after two guys who could totally demolish her if they so choosed. Plus going after more than one guy and being serious with both is a red flag and a bad idea. Jealous is not what you want from two guys who both think they love you (more like want you for breakfast). Jacob has been lying and keeping secrets and is not trustworthy! He has a group of mumbo jumbo wolves just like him and alone or together they are all very dangerous! I have a question: Why does Jacob continually go after a girl he knows cares for another and is off limits and who he knoes he can never have? He is a stalker and he has obsessions that prove he is mentally distressed. He is probably angry and moody along with jealous and these are all qualities of someone capable of dangerous actions and should not be trusted nor adored by anyone.
Thank you! That is all for now...

~Tw*l*ght Hater Trio
Foot note: In my opinion Taylor Lautner is very attractive, yes, but do not be decieved by his character Jacob Black who is obviously insane and dangerous!!! Once more evil is in the air just like with Edward Cullens!!!

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Edward Cullen: Dreamy or Deathly?

Edward Cullen is viewed by many teenage girls as a wonderfully dreamy, nearly perfect man. To them, he is the perfect, supportive, lovely, soft boyfriend. This is a LIE! He is in no way dreamy or sensational. He is murderous, blood-thirsty (literally), withdrawn, and rather an antisocial. We would like to put the truth out there so you & the others around you are not believing this terrible untruth. So please take caution that you will not get caught up in this evil & very absurd vampire craze. We only speak the truth so when you make your desicion as to whether Edward is epic or evil, please be honest with yourself & remember these truths. Thank you.

An In Depth Profile of Bella Swan

Bella needs to make up her mind on whether or not she likes Edward, a bloodsucking albino, or Jacob, half man half wolf. Both seem like terrible choices to us personally. These certain choices when looking for a guy tells us that Bella has major emotional issues. She is also mental and disturbed! What girl in her right mind goes out and says, "I think the right kind of guy to date would be someone like an evil vampire or a werewolf."?? She is obviously crazy or insane to some degree. And another thing why would you not be freaked out and afraid of being bit and turning into a vampire when he admits to everything?!? His own family wants to have you for breakfast. That is a very bad sign. I say dump him, get rid of wolf man and find a nice guy who won't eat you! Seriously Bella, what is your deal??

A quick over view of Twilight!

TWILIGHT IS STUPID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We are extreme haters of Twilight and its creepy albino, bloodsucking characters. Edward would eat Bella! Now what sort of "dreamy" husband would be canibalistic and eat their wife?!?!!?!?!? So come on society, tell us how this just isn't wrong!!! And half wolf half man men aren't attractive in any way, even if they had a 70 pack! *his face looks squished* Also, he's inappropriate for being shirtless constantly. This is a severe breech of social ettiquite. Bella is a clingy, insecure, troubled teenage girl who has the audacity to date a vampire to find her self worth. Also, twilight encourages things our society should not be encouraging or uplifting. It does NOT enlighten you to what you are missing by practicing their actions, it just makes you end up in a bad spot. We will not go into detail of these unspeakable things. It promotes bad morals & evil things. Overall The Tw*l*ght Series is a horrifying & disgusting series. If you have any self respect you will not read these books especially after being enlightened by this blog. We do this only out of concern, care, & love for you.

Footnote: We will not be using the word Twilight any longer. We will now refer to it as a dirty offensive word. It will now be spelled Tw*l*ght.